The Weiß Toga Party
by Renza
Summary: The boys are forced into having a party... with some unwanted guests (Yaoi in later parts)
1. Invitations

The WeiÃŸ Toga Party  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own them, I'm just borrowing then for a little bit. I haven't seen all of WeiÃŸ Kreuz so I'm taking many creative liberties with this. Because of this, many characters... *cough* AYA ...may experience mild to severe cases of OOC-ness.  
  
"blah" = spoken  
  
//blah// = thought  
  
/blah/ = telepathy  
  
BLAH = shouted  
  
  
  
~  
  
The four boys stared blankly at Manx and Birman.  
  
It was Yohji who found his voice first, "W-why?"  
  
"Oh for heaven's sake!" Manx sighed. "Look at it as a respite from the fighting. It'll give everyone a chance to communicate outside of a battlefield."  
  
"But there's only four of us! Besides, we already communicate pretty well... except for Aya... but still!" Omi complained.  
  
"Excuse me?!" the redhead snapped.  
  
As Birman and Manx turned to leave the Koneko, Birman called back, "I've taken the liberty of sending out a few invitations."  
  
Aya's eyes darkened, "We are NOT having a fucking TOGA PARTY!"  
  
"Yes, you are. Now stop complaining, Abyssinian." And with that, the women left the shop.  
  
"Great!" Ken moaned. "Where are we supposed to find togas?"  
  
Without warning, a red-haired man popped in.  
  
"You called?"  
  
Yohji screamed like a girl and grabbed the hose.  
  
"AIEEEEEE! Get back, vile creature!"  
  
The newcomer shreiked as an irate Yohji tried to beat him to death with the Garden Hose of Doom, "But he said he was looking for Touga!"  
  
"Not Touga, you idiot," Yohji retorted, "TOGA! T-O-G-A!"  
  
Touga burst into tears and ran from the hose weilding psycho as Balinese chased him out.  
  
"SHI-NE!"  
  
*blink* "Um, Yohji..." Omi whispered. "Don't do that. One half-crazed death- obsessed berzerker around here is plenty."  
  
"I HEARD THAT!"  
  
"Easy Aya..." Ken cooed trying to soothe his beloved Aya's ego. "Oh for the love of god, will you breathe already? Now... back to the matter at hand. Where do we find togas?"  
  
The four assassins exchanged puzzled looks. The room was dead silent. The clock ticked away. The water from the hose splashed onto the floor. Aya passed out.  
  
"I told you to breathe, baka," Ken muttered.  
  
Suddenly, Yohji jumped up.  
  
"I GOT IT!" and he raced through the door and out of sight.  
  
Omi raised an eyebrow, "What the hell was that all about?"  
  
Ken shrugged and, with Omi at his heels, carried Aya downstairs where he regained consciousness a few minutes later.  
  
Yohji returned, looked around dumbly, and went downstairs carrying one of his bedsheets.  
  
"TA DA!" he exclaimed, and grinned.  
  
Aya rolled his eyes. "It's official. He's snapped."  
  
"No! Really! Look, see? Instant toga!" Yohji yipped wrapping the sheet around his body and securing the loose ends at his shoulder with his ScÃ¼nci.  
  
Omi burst out laughing, "Why didn't I think of that! Now that the toga problem is taken care of... all we have to worry about is who else Birman invited."  
  
"NOOOOOO!"  
  
Ken's scream echoed throughout the shop.  
  
"What is it?" Omi asked. "What's wrong, Ken-kun?"  
  
Aya glanced at the paper in Ken's hand and went pale.  
  
"She didn't... no... Well, that's it. We're screwed."  
  
"Birman's invites?"  
  
"O~h yeah."  
  
Omi eeped when he read the list.  
  
"Oh please no..."  
  
Yohji snatched the sheet from Ken's shaking hand.  
  
"ABSOLUTELY NOT! NO! NONONONONO!"  
  
~  
  
"Hey, Mr. Bradley Crawford! You got mail!"  
  
The precog walked past, plucking the letter from the other man's fingers.  
  
"Don't yell in the house. And DO NOT call me that. EVER."  
  
"Yup, uh-huh, whatever you say, Mister Bradley... OW!"  
  
"Schuldig, don't push me," Brad snipped yanking on the telepath's greenish- brown hair... hard.  
  
"Okay, okay..." he replied, rubbing the back of his head. /You're a prick, you know that?/  
  
/Shut up and stay out of my head, Schu./  
  
The telepath muttered something under his breath in German, headed toward the kitchen, and screamed bloody murder.  
  
"NAGI! THAT WAS MINE! BRAAAAAAAAAD! NAGI ATE ALL MY ICE CREAM!"  
  
"I DID NOT! IT WAS HALF EMPTY WHEN I GOT IT OUT!"  
  
"NUH-UH! IT WAS FULL THIS MORNING!"  
  
"I JUST GOT BACK FROM SCHOOL NOT EVEN FIFTEEN MINUTES AGO! I DIDN'T HAVE TIME TO EAT YOUR FUCKING ICE CREAM!"  
  
"DIDN'T ANYONE EVER TELL YOU IT'S NOT POLITE TO SWEAR?"  
  
"I'M 15! I'LL DO WHATEVER I DAMN WELL PLEASE!"  
  
Brad moaned and entered the room, setting the unopened envelope on the table next to an empty carton of Triple Chocolate Fudge Swirl.  
  
"Will the two of you knock it off? Schu, Nagi didn't touch your ice cream. I wouldn't be surprised if you ate it and forgot. Nagi, put Schu down... and don't swear."  
  
The young telekinetic's eyes refocused and he dropped Schuldig with a loud thud.  
  
/Be glad I'm not feeling vengeful, Chibi. And I know you ate my.../  
  
He was interrupted when a high-pitched yowling came from just outside the window. Three heads turned as one.  
  
"Farfie..." Schuldig snarled.  
  
The knife-licking psychopath strode inside with a huge smile on his face.  
  
"God cried. He doesn't like to see ice cream melt on the pavement."  
  
Schu's eyes narrowed viciously, "YOU! YOU THREW AWAY PERFECTLY GOOD ICE CREAM! I WAS GONNA EAT THAT!"  
  
Farfarello twirled his knife in his mouth, his words slightly muffled, "Oh well. It met a better end."  
  
The telepath was poised to launch himself at the madman when Nagi's voice cut in.  
  
"What's that?"  
  
"Huh?" Schu glanced up. "Oh. Brad got a letter."  
  
"Who's it from? Don't tell me you didn't open it!"  
  
Brad sighed and opened the little white envelope, his eyes quickly scanning the contents.  
  
"It's an invitation. For a toga party at the Koneko No Sumi Ie. We're not going."  
  
Immediately five eyes and an eyepatch were turned on him. Three voices echoed in unison, "PLEEEEEEEEEASE?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Pleeeeeeeeeease?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Please?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Please?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Please?"  
  
"No."  
  
/This isn't working... Chibi, time to turn on the waterworks./  
  
"Brad?"  
  
"What now, Nagi?" He didn't look at the boy: he knew what was coming. Nagi's 'Bambi eyes' were hard to resist.  
  
"Braddy?"  
  
Catching the precog off guard by using a name Nagi hadn't called him in years, Brad looked up... ...to see a pair of large golden-brown eyes on the verge of tears.  
  
"Please?" the telekinetic sniffled.  
  
His resolve shattered.  
  
"Oh, all right."  
  
"YATTA!" Nagi squealed in delight.  
  
/WeiÃŸ in togas... this is gonna be fun./  
  
/Schu, get your mind out of the gutter./  
  
/Only if you do, Chibi. Only if you do./  
  
/Bite me!/  
  
/Maybe later./  
  
Farfarello paused in his self-mutilation to ask Brad something everyone else seemed to have forgotten for the moment.  
  
"What do we do about togas?"  
  
Again, the red-haired man popped in.  
  
"I'M RIGHT HERE!"  
  
Farfie's eye lit up. Pulling the knive from his mouth, he chased after Touga, grinning maniacally.  
  
"YIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYI!"  
  
Brad shook his head sadly.  
  
"Schu, call his studio and find out what they want for compensation. After Farfie gets done with him, they're gonna need a replacement. Oh, and see if they want whatever's left of him. I don't want that thing all over my carpet."  
  
"Hi. Um... I need to speak to someone about... er... compensation or reimbursement. Yes, I'll hold... Yes, um... I need to speak to someone about compensation. You see, Touga came by and there was an accident... yes... yes... very dead, Miss... yes... uh-huh... okay... What do you want us to do with the remains? But... but... but... *sigh* I'll let him know. You have a nice day, Miss Tenjou."  
  
Schuldig hung up the phone with a sigh.  
  
"Um... Brad... They don't want anything. Actually, Utena said we can keep him. "  
  
"MOMMYYYYYYYYYYYY~!" Touga's shreik was cut short by Farfarello's bowie knife.  
  
"FARFIE! DON'T GET THAT ON MY CARPETING! Okay, back to business... the togas. I guess we'll have to use bedsheets."  
  
Nagi, who was slowly turning green from Farfarello's plaything, froze.  
  
"B-bedsheets? We'll look retarded!" Already his mind was picturing as many embarassing situations as he could muster. "I get beat up enough at school! I don't need to get beat up at some party! I don't know if I want to go anymore."  
  
"Why not? They'll be wearing bedsheets as well. I've already forseen it. FARFIE! TAKE THAT THING OUTSIDE! IT STINKS!"  
  
Sighing, Nagi retreated to his room to see if he could find a sheet to use. As he started up the stairs, he gagged at the sight of Farf's new "toy" and instead, locked himself in the bathroom.  
  
Brad sank down on the sofa, his mind racing, a cold, calculating smile on his face.  
  
"Schu, clean Farfie's mess up."  
  
//This is going to be an interesting night, to say the least...//  
  
~  
  
"Wheeeeeee!" the girl shreiked as she spun around, holding a stuffed rabbit in the air.  
  
"This is so boring. I wonder what Yohji's doing..."  
  
"Tot, be careful! You don't want Rabbi-chan to need stitches, do you?"  
  
"What's this? ... Girls, how would you like to go to WeiÃŸ's toga party at the Koneko?"  
  
"HAI!" Tot cried.  
  
"Okay. Anything's better than this. And I might get to see Yohji..." Neu's voice drifted off.  
  
"WeiÃŸ?" SchÃ¶en's hand came up to trace the scars on her cheek. "... Sure..."  
  
Hell smiled as the group ran off to find sheets to use as togas. "Maybe they're not as bad as we thought..."  
  
~ 


	2. Preparations

//Togas... Why TOGAS?! Who the hell came up with that idea? It's retarded! And why the hell did she invite them?! She knows what's gonna happen! We don't get along! And now she's forcing us to be in the same room wearing nothing but bedsheets! Where the hell is Ken's sewing machine? I am NOT going to be embarrassed like everyone else when their bedsheets fall off! Okay... machine found... now... how do I use this... oh well... first time for everything...//  
  
Aya sighed and set to work trying to sew up his sheet.  
  
An hour and forty-five minutes later...  
  
"I HATE THIS! KEN!"  
  
The chocolate eyed brunette raced into the room.  
  
"Aya! *gasp* What's wrong? *pant* Is everything *pant* is everything okay?" Ken gasped doubling over, his hands on his knees. He looked as if he'd just run a marathon.  
  
Aya glared at him.  
  
"NO! Everything is NOT okay!" Violet eyes brimmed with tears. "I can't DO this! It doesn't wanna work! Ken, fix it? Please?"  
  
Ken surveyed the room in shock, nearly tripping over Aya's black boots. The sewing machine sat on the floor, huge knots of thread peeking out from every open area available. Empty spools and fabric shreds littered the floor. A long white extension cord wove its way across the bed and onto the floor to the cord of the machine. And, in the center of the room behind the sewing machine, was a big purple satin sack with eyes.  
  
Aya had somehow managed to sew himself in the sheet. There was no opening save for the one the redhead was peering out of, which was about the size of his fist.  
  
Ken collapsed on the floor, laughing hysterically as Aya glared at him again, eyes overflowing, tears streaming down pale cheeks.  
  
"It's not funny!" he cried indignantly.  
  
"Bet me!" Ken shreiked and laughed harder. "You look like a sack of potatoes!"  
  
Aya sniffled. "I hope you die laughing."  
  
Footsteps in the hall signaled the arrival of Omi and Yoji. Aya promptly fell over and curled up in a ball to avoid being seen. It didn't work.  
  
"Ken! Are you alright? What's so funny?"  
  
The ex-J-Leaguer looked up at the sound of Yoji's voice, but he couldn't stop laughing.  
  
"What is it, Ken?" Omi asked.  
  
Ken didn't get to form a responce before Yoji saw 'it'... and followed Ken's lead, busting into a fit of giggles.  
  
"Oh my god! Aya how on earth did you manage that?!" Omi exclaimed, rushing to his friend's side.  
  
"He looks like a sack of potatoes!" Yoji howled. "Or a giant caterpillar!"  
  
"You are SO DEAD! When I get out of this, you are BOTH SO DEAD!" the purple sack snarled, voice shaking.  
  
Omi laughed. "Hang on a second, Aya. I'll be right back."  
  
The genki blonde disappeared momentarily before returning with Aya's katana. Violet eyes widened in terror.  
  
"Hold still. I don't want to accidentally cut you."  
  
"Oh great. THAT'S real reassuring..." the redhead muttered. "Hey! Watch it! That thing's sharp!"  
  
Within a few minutes, Omi had freed the other boy from his satin cocoon, only to have him glomp onto him for dear life, his face streaked with tears.  
  
The other two, having finally calmed down, took one look at this new situation and started laughing all over again.  
  
Aya was partially dressed, his pants still inside the sheet and sewn into the seam. He'd had to take them off to get out. Currently he was huddled against Omi, clad in only a black sleeveless shirt, boxers, and one sock, his hair sticking out all over from static electricity, and he was crying.  
  
Glaring at Ken and Yoji, he sobbed, "I hate you! You're so mean!"  
  
Yoji sat up brushing tears from his eyes. "Exactly how DID you pull that off?" He dissolved into giggles again. "And why are you wearing baby-blue teddybear boxers?!"  
  
Aya shrugged, burying his face in Omi's chest, and shot back, "At least I don't have to write my NAME on them..."  
  
Yoji sweatdropped. "A-ano..."  
  
"Guys, leave him alone," Omi said gently. "It's okay Aya... the evil Violet- Satin-Sheet Monster is dead. You're gonna be okay."  
  
Ken and Yoji left the room, still snickering about what had happened.  
  
"Wait till Crawford hears this!" Ken giggled.  
  
"And Schuldig!" Yoji added. "Not to mention Manx, Birman, and Persia!"  
  
"I HATE YOU GUYS! I HOPE YOU GET HIT BY A BUS!"  
  
Omi sighed. "Here Aya... I'll help you with your toga."  
  
"Thanks, Omittchi," Aya sniffled, wiping tears from his face.  
  
As the two of them got to work, Omi rolled his eyes.  
  
//This is going to be a long day...//  
  
~  
  
"Yes... uh-huh... okay... 7 pm?... alright... wait... but... we can't... we don't... *sigh*... okay... 7 pm... we'll be there... uh-huh... buh-bye." *click* "Oh shit. We're seriously screwed. Can any of you cook?" Schu asked innocently.  
  
"No!" Nagi called from the living room.  
  
"Not unless it hurts God..."  
  
Schuldig's face went deathly pale. "Uh... nevermind... Brad! We're supposed to bring some sort of dessert with us and the party is at 7 pm tomorrow."  
  
The Oracle smirked. "I'll call someone and see about getting something made for the... on second thought, let Farfarello cook. We just won't eat it."  
  
Nagi yawned entering the room. His brown hair was tousled from lying on the sofa, his jeans and tee shirt rumpled as if he had slept in his clothes, and his golden brown eyes were half closed.  
  
"That was the most boring movie I have ever seen. I don't even know why I sat through it. So, who's cooking?"  
  
"What were you watching, Nags?" asked Schu.  
  
"I think it was American Pie. Who's going to cook?"  
  
"Farfie. Why the hell were you watching that?! It's rated R! You're not old enough!" Brad exclaimed.  
  
"It was on, I don't care, and now I don't have to worry about seeing it when I AM old enough. Why are you letting him use any sort of electrical appliance?"  
  
"I'm cooking? This'll hurt God for sure!"  
  
Nagi yawned again. "I think *yawn* it'll definately hurt SOMETHING."  
  
Brad cleared his throat, "Ahem... just don't make a mess, Farf. So I take it everyone's set for tomorrow?"  
  
In the kitchen, a blender whirred to life.  
  
"Not yet."  
  
"No."  
  
"I'M HURTING GOD! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"  
  
*sigh* "Will you all try to be ready by 6:30?"  
  
"I guess."  
  
"Fine. Can I..."  
  
"No Schu. You are NOT using my suspenders."  
  
"Please?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Please?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Please?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Please?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Please?"  
  
"Oh just give him the damn suspenders!"  
  
"Nagi! I thought I told you not to swear! GO TO YOUR ROOM!"  
  
The telekinetic froze, eyes wide. "Did you just..."  
  
"Yes, now GO!"  
  
*growls* "I hate my life..." *stomp stomp stomp stomp stomp SLAM*  
  
"Brad?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Please?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Please?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Please?"  
  
"Would you try this and let me know if it hurts God enough?"  
  
*both in unison* "NO!"  
  
*sniffle* "... Nagi's right. You guys are SO MEAN!"  
  
~  
  
Tot twirled around in circles, her sheet billowing out around her as she moved, grinning like an idiot. The other three women of Schrient set to work in the kitchen preparing a dessert for the party.  
  
Neu sighed, the mixer humming loudly as she combined the ingredients in a large bowl. "I hope they appreciate what we're going thorugh..." A startled cry diverted her attention.  
  
"NO! That's way too much!"  
  
She glanced up in time to see Schoen dump the entire contents of a bag of flour into Hell's bowl.  
  
"I don't care. I want to make him pay for what he did to me."  
  
"Maybe so, but other people may have wanted to eat these!"  
  
The blonde shrugged, "So what."  
  
Hell sighed. //This is going to be a long day...//  
  
Distracted from what she was doing, Neu failed to notice that she'd lifted the mixer. The beaters were now spraying the counters, walls, floor, window, and herself, in chocolate batter. "Oops..." She switched off the mixer and started cleaning up the gooey mess just as Tot walked in.  
  
"Ooh! I wanna try it!" the sea-green haired girl yipped excitedly, bounding over to Neu's bowl and dipping her ingers into the mix.  
  
"Tot! Don't eat all the batter or I won't have any left for the cake!"  
  
//Oh, yes... this will definately be a long day...//  
  
~ 


	3. Waiting

Disclaimer: I don't own them, I'm just borrowing then for a little bit. I haven't seen all of Weiß Kreuz so I'm taking many creative liberties with this. Because of this, many characters... *cough* AYA ...may experience mild to severe cases of OOC-ness.  
  
"blah" = spoken  
  
//blah// = thought  
  
/blah/ = telepathy  
  
BLAH = shouted  
  
  
  
~  
  
Aya surveyed the table with a critical eye. "Plates, cups, stereo, drinks, games..."  
  
He froze.  
  
"Games? What the?! Whose bright idea was it to get these... these... CHILDISH games?!"  
  
"Huh?" Ken asked, his voice sounding rather strained as he struggled to drag a large folding table down the small spiral staircase. "Now what?"  
  
"This is humiliating! We shouldn't have to put up with this! We're ASSASSINS, for heaven's sake! And now we're reduced to 'hosting' a stupid party, playing BABY GAMES, and wearing makeshift TOGAS!" Aya sounded as if he were about to be led to the slaughter.  
  
Omi rolled his eyes, "We can't do anything about it. Remember who Birman invited? If any of them are excited about it, let alone actually coming, they'd probably kill us if we cancelled at the last minute." //Besides... I'm looking forward to seeing Nagi without having to worry about having my head smashed in.//  
  
"Speaking of humiliating..." Yoji purred from the door, "You never DID answer my question..."  
  
"What question?" Aya snapped.  
  
"About the baby-blue... *mmph*"  
  
The rest of his words were muffled as Omi clamped his hand over Yoji's mouth, blue eyes shooting daggers. "If you value your life, even in the slightest, you'll keep your mouth shut," he hissed.  
  
"Can somebody help me? Please? Aya? Omi? Yoji? Anybody? I can't get... OW! Lousy stupid piece of... I hate you, you stupid table! Oh geez! Heads up!" *CRASH*  
  
"I-ITAI!"  
  
"Aya! Gomen! It slipped! Honest!" Ken was panicking. He'd lost his grip on the table he'd been hauling down the stairs. It skidded along the banister and slammed into Aya knocking him to the floor with a loud crash. Racing down the last few stairs, he was imediately at Aya's side, playing mother- hen and making sure his beloved wasn't hurt. //What I wouldn't give to just be able to hold him, kiss him, tell him everything's okay... without having to physically maim him.//  
  
"Pretty stars... pretty, pretty stars..."  
  
The sound of stilettos on metal caused the Weiß boys to look up.  
  
"Is everyone alright? I thought I heard a crash!"  
  
//Great. Now THEY'RE here... could this get any worse?// Ken mused.  
  
Aya shook off the big fluffy stars dancing around his head, "No, everything is NOT ALRIGHT! First you force us into having this... this... THING, then you spring that poor excuse for a guest list on us, then I get stuck in a sheet and have a table smack me in the head, and you ask if everything's ALRIGHT?!"  
  
Ken sighed, and shaking his head, said, "What all do we need? We got Omi's stereo..."  
  
"What were you doing in my room?!"  
  
"...Yoji's five cubes of Mountain Dew..."  
  
"KEN!"  
  
"...the guests are supposed to bring snacks..."  
  
Omi, Yoji, and Aya exchanged worried glances.  
  
"...and a bunch of babyish games that I have no clue where they came from."  
  
"That," Manx replied, "would be my doing. I figured that since none of you would willingly converse with the others, a little force might be necessary to keep this party from falling on its face."  
  
"But Manx!" Ken whined, "Weiß and Schwarz are ENEMIES! How are we supposed to get along if everyone's trying to kill each other?"  
  
"Nagi and I will hardly be trying to kill each other," Omi mumbled.  
  
"You're forgetting Schrient," Birman added.  
  
Ken nearly face-vaulted. //Not them, too! How am I supposed to… but Aya and I… I have to… four ditzy girls… and Schwarz… Why me?//  
  
"Is there a reason why you brought 'Pin the Tail on the Donkey'? What's thi... M-Musical Chairs? Oh dear god... Next you'll be having us play 'Truth or Dare'!" Yoji was horrified.  
  
Birman paused, tapping her index finger to her lips. "Hm... not a bad idea. I'll add it to the list."  
  
That was all it took for Aya to lose it. He jumped up grabbing a broom, and lunged at the women. "SHI-NE!"  
  
Manx raised an eyebrow. "If you behave, I might be willing to try and get Takatori as a piñata."  
  
Aya slammed on the brakes and sat on the floor, broom in hand, violet eyes sparkling all innocent-like, a huge genuine smile plastered all over his face.  
  
Sighing, Omi questioned Birman for information, "Who all said they were coming? Is Schwarz coming? Is Nagi coming? What time? When will they get here? What time is it now? How much longer? If Nagi's coming, do you know what he'll be wearing? What if..."  
  
"Omi." Birman laughed. "Calm down. Both, yes, yes, 7 tonight, around 7, 12:30, six and a half hours, and no. Anything else?"  
  
"Are you sure Nagi's coming?"  
  
"Yes, I'm sure."  
  
"Really truly?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"You're absolutely positively 100% sure Nagi's coming?"  
  
"For the last time, Omi, YES!"  
  
"Okay!" the now overly-genki blonde chirped.  
  
"Why are you so worried about whether or not the Prodigy shows up?" Manx asked, eying the boy curiously.  
  
Omi paled. "Um... no reason... just wanted to know if there'd be anyone my age here..."  
  
A long pause followed.  
  
Aya saved him from the sudden awkward silence by announcing that they should start setting up if they were to have time to get themselves ready.  
  
Twenty minutes later...  
  
"Well, that should do it," Yoji groaned, dusting invisible dirt from his pants. "Now all that's left is the wait."  
  
"Aren't you forgetting something?"  
  
"Oh, yeah! Thanks, Ken-kun." He picked up his sunglasses from the coffee table and high-tailed it up the stairs.  
  
Ken sighed. "Idiot."  
  
The three remaining members finished setting up the basement of the Koneko. By the time they were finished, they were exhausted and streaked with dirt, dust, and soapy water.  
  
"That about does it," Aya remarked as he started up.  
  
Ken stifled a yawn, "Where do you think you're going?"  
  
"To get a shower."  
  
"Can I come?"  
  
Abyssinian froze in mid-stride. "N-Nani?"  
  
"Huh? Oh... I uh... I said 'Have fun'." //Yeah right. You're such a bad liar, Hidaka Ken...//  
  
A skeptical look crossed violet eyes. "Oh..." //Liar. If he asked... if he came right out and asked... without trying to hide...//  
  
He was nearly plowed over as Omi pushed past him on the stairs.  
  
"If you're not gonna go, then I will!"  
  
"HEY!"  
  
Ken looked anywhere but at the redhead. //Time is gonna crawl...//  
  
~ 


	4. Arrivals

Disclaimer: I don't own them, I'm just borrowing then for a little bit. I haven't seen all of WeiÃŸ Kreuz so I'm taking many creative liberties with this. Because of this, many characters... *cough* AYA ...may experience mild to severe cases of OOC-ness.  
  
"blah" = spoken  
  
//blah// = thought  
  
/blah/ = telepathy  
  
BLAH = shouted  
  
  
  
~  
  
"Schuldig, Farfarello, Nagi! Get out here now! We're late!"  
  
Brad was annoyed. So far, he'd had to clean up the mess Farfarello left in the kitchen, find the keys to his car which Schuldig had misplaced the night before, fish a sheet out of the hall closet for himself, find the path buried somewhere under mounds of discarded clothes in Nagi's room to reach the computer and check his e-mail (because he wanted to, not because he had to), and call the Koneko to let them know that they were running late. His carefully planned schedule had gone out the window somewhere between the kitchen and the keys. Now, he was standing at the frontdoor, in a bedsheet, waiting impatiently for the rest of his dysfunctional "family".  
  
"If you aren't out here by the time I count to..."  
  
He was cut off by thundering footsteps in the upstairs hall.  
  
Stepping to the left as the trio reached the top of the stairs, he managed to aviod the pile-up. Nagi tripped as Farfie tried to push past him, and fell, grabbing Schuldig's sheet in an attempt to keep his balance. Schu, caught unprepared, fell forward and down the stairs, taking the other two with him. By the time they reached the bottom, they lay in a sprawled heap of arms, legs, and sheets. Farfie grinned maniacally.  
  
"Let's do that again!"  
  
The others stared at him in pained shock. "NO!"  
  
"Why not? Crushing children hurts God."  
  
Nagi, his voice muffled by having his head buried under Schu's toga, snapped irritably, "Farfie, you're heavy! Get off me!"  
  
Brad rolled his eyes, dragged them apart, and herded the group out the door to his car.  
  
"WAIT!" Farfie yelped. "I forgot something!" He turned on his heel and raced back inside returning a few moments later carrying a large brown cardboard box.  
  
"What the hell is that?" Nagi muttered.  
  
"Nagi... what did I tell you about swearing?" Brad asked cooly.  
  
"I know, I know. 'Go to your room'." The telekinetic made a break for the house, but was stopped in mid-stride by Schuldig.  
  
/You sure you wanna stay here? Tsukiyono's giving off some really... interesting... thoughts. You don't want to disappoint him, now do you?/  
  
That was all it took. Nagi retraced his steps, jumped in the car, and yelled at the others to hurry up.  
  
"That wasn't so hard, now was it?" Schu smirked.  
  
"Shut up and get it!" he growled.  
  
"Careful! You'll mess up my dessert!" Farfie exclaimed as Schu pushed him towards the car.  
  
Nagi paled. "I don't wanna know."  
  
"Good, 'cos I didn't make it for you. It's for the WeiÃŸ kitties, and it hurts God. So there."  
  
~  
  
The drive to the Koneko took less time than Brad had expected, but perhaps it was because he was driving at about 80 mph through the city.  
  
When they arrived, he jumped out and went straight to the door and knocked loudly, not bothering to wait for the rest of them.  
  
Schu sighed, re-adjusting his sheet and the suspenders he had "borrowed" from Brad. Farfie shoved his box at Nagi and slurped happily on a lollipop (Brad wouldn't let him have any knives at the party). Nagi was practically bent over backwards to keep from dropping the "dessert"- the box was about half his size, heavy, awkward, and giving off a weird stench.  
  
Brad buried his face in his hand as a voice sounded on the other side of the door.  
  
"I GOT IT!..." *crash*  
  
~  
  
"I GOT IT!... *crash* OW! YOJI, PUT YOUR SHOES AWAY!" Ken cried, his voice breaking as he tripped over said shoes and sailed into the door.  
  
Aya raised an eyebrow. "He was in the J-League?"  
  
Ken yanked the door open, scrunching his nose in disdain at Aya's comment, a fake smile plastered across his face.  
  
"Konnichiwa. C'mon in."  
  
He didn't bother to wait for them to enter. Instead, he left the door open and walked away, leaving the last one in to shut it.  
  
Schu smiled and shut the door, taking pity on Nagi who was the last to enter and was currently wrestling with the box. /Poor Kitty. Isn't Fujimiya paying any attention to you? Don't worry. There'll be more'n enough to go around by the time the night's out. We could make him SO jealous.../  
  
Chocloate eyes widened, a blush stealing across tanned cheeks, as Schuldig projected various images through his mind.  
  
"Can... someone... take this... please?" Nagi asked pitifully from under the box.  
  
Omi raced to help him. "Here. We can set it over there next to the Dew..." He paused as he caught wind of the scent emanating from within. "What IS this?"  
  
"Dunno. Farf made it."  
  
"HEY! BE CAREFUL WITH THAT! IT TOOK ALL NIGHT TO MAKE THAT!" The Irishman gingerly took the box from the boys and set it neatly on the table, but didn't open it. "There."  
  
Without warning, Schu shreiked with laughter.  
  
"What the..." Omi began.  
  
All eyes were on the German telepath.  
  
"And people say I'M psycho," Farfarello mused.  
  
"How... why... sheet... sewing... TEDDY-BEARS!" Schu was having trouble getting the words out around wild laughter.  
  
Brad was confused. "What is he talking about?"  
  
"AYA!" Schu howled. "He... he... in a..."  
  
"Breathe. Calm down. Try again."  
  
Schuldig brushed the tears from his eyes, took a deep breath and tried again. "He... in a sheet... teddy-bears!" He started laughing again. There was no way he would be able to say it with a straight face, so he projected what he'd seen in Ken's head to everyone present.  
  
The other three members of Schwarz joined their teammate, laughing so hard they were practically in tears. Omi and Ken snickered at the reaction it had on the newcomers. Aya was fuming.  
  
"IT'S NOT FUNNY!"  
  
"Bet me!" Crawford cried, and doubled over laughing.  
  
~  
  
"I hope they're not too mad that we're a little late," Neu said, glancing at Hell.  
  
"If Tot hadn't eaten all the batter, and SchÃ¶en hadn't ruined the other, we wouldn't BE late," came the sharp retort.  
  
The girls pulled up to the curb outside the Koneko, parking behind Crawford's BMW.  
  
"Well, here we are. Everybody out! Looks like Schwarz is already here..."  
  
They walked up to find the door unlocked, and the sound of laughter coming from inside.  
  
SchÃ¶en didn't waste any time, opening the door and just walking in.  
  
"You shouldn't do that. It's not right," Tot complained, hands on her hips.  
  
The blonde just shrugged, "We were invited, weren't we?"  
  
The sight that greeted them made them stare in shock/horror/puzzlement.  
  
~ 


	5. Technical Difficulties

Disclaimer: I don't own them. I haven't seen all of Weiß Kreuz so I'm taking many creative liberties with this. Because of this, many characters... *cough* AYA ...may experience mild to severe cases of OOC- ness.  
  
A side note…: I myself am not too fond of Schrient. They took up precious screen-time that could've been better spent on any/all of the boys. Because of this, if there are any inconsistencies, such as the spelling of their names, it's cos I really don't like them enough to worry about it.  
  
"blah" = spoken  
  
//blah// = thought  
  
/blah/ = telepathy  
  
BLAH = shouted  
  
  
  
~  
  
Seven guys in bedsheets. Six of them doubled over, shrieking with laughter. One looking murderous. One mysteriously absent.  
  
The girls surveyed the room, with disdain... until Tot saw someone she recognized.  
  
"NAGI!" she squealed.  
  
The sound was like a cold shower or a stiff drink. His head snapped up, eyes widening in sheer terror.  
  
"Oh shit," he whispered, grabbing Omi's midnight blue toga and ducking behind him. "Keep it away from me."  
  
"Why? What's going on?" Omi seemed a little flustered. "I don't understand."  
  
Schu tipped his head back so he could see what was happening, "Ooh, Nagi, looks like your little woman's here." He was lying on his back on the floor, the black sheet held in place by the suspenders.  
  
"She's not MY 'WOMAN'! I don't WANT a woman! Or a GIRL, or even a LADY! Omi, make it go away."  
  
Tot pouted, "You don't like me anymore?"  
  
Nagi was saved from responding when the missing Weiß member decided to make his appearance.  
  
"Okay! Yoji has arrived! Let the party begin!"  
  
The group looked up. Aya clamped a hand over his mouth and ran for the bathroom. Ken was wide-eyed. Omi and Nagi cringed, burying their faces in each other's shoulder. Schuldig broke into a fit of giggles for the second time that night. Brad arched an eyebrow and wrinkled his nose. Tot and Schöen screamed. Neu and Hell stared. Farfie was thrilled.  
  
"He's hurting God!"  
  
Everyone present was dressed in bedsheets. Everyone, that is, except Yoji. He was wearing a leopard print hand towel tied with string to resemble a loincloth.  
  
"I don't see what's so funny," he snipped at Schu.  
  
The telepath smirked. "Are you trying to impersonate Tarzan?"  
  
"Why you little!" Balinese launched himself at Schuldig, intent on wringing his neck.  
  
"Don't. Touch. Him. Yoji."  
  
Manx and Birman descended the stairs, each dressed in their own "togas".  
  
"Now. Shall we get this party started?"  
  
Ken cleared his throat, toying with the hem of his red-and-white-checkered vinyl tablecloth/toga (What can I say… He wanted to be different? Couldn't find a sheet? Somehow, a tablecloth suits him…).  
  
"Yes?" Birman asked, casting a sidelong glance at the fidgeting Siberian.  
  
"Shouldn't we… shouldn't we wait… for Aya to get out of the… um… bathroom?"  
  
"I'm right here. Yoji, could you PLEASE go put some clothes on? You're scaring the kid." Aya was trying not to look directly at him for fear that the rest of his dinner would make a return trip.  
  
Omi and Nagi glared at him. "Who are you calling KIDS?! We're just as mature as any of you, if not more!"  
  
A giggle and a tug on Nagi's cerulean sheet made the boy go deathly pale.  
  
"Oh, cute! I like your little black shorts, Nagi!" Tot yipped.  
  
"HEY! GET YOUR HANDS OFF HIM, YOU MOLDY-HAIRED WENCH!" Omi was furious, instinctively grabbing for darts that weren't there. //Dammit, I knew I was forgetting something…//  
  
Aya rolled his eyes. "I said KID, not KIDS. And I was referring to HER." He pointed towards Tot for emphasis.  
  
Nagi was on the verge of tears. "Why me? Why won't she leave me alone?" He rounded on the girl, his voice rising in a feverish pitch until he was shouting. "WHY WON'T YOU LEAVE ME ALONE? I DON'T LIKE YOU! I LIKE HIM! *pointing at Omi* GOT IT? I. DON'T. LIKE. GIRLS."  
  
"Why would you like him? He's a BOY. It's icky." Needless to say, she was confused. "I know! You're friends! That's why you like him!"  
  
Schu nudged Brad and whispered, "If someone doesn't do something, he's gonna blow."  
  
"What do you WANT me to do? He's a big boy, he can take care of himself."  
  
"Ye~ah. We're friends." Nagi hissed through clenched teeth. "See? Friends!" He grabbed a startled Omi's face in his hands and kissed him roughly.  
  
"EEEEEEWWWWW! Friends don't do that!" she cried indignantly. "That's so... icky!"  
  
"Exactly. I'm icky. Go away."  
  
Omi stared at Nagi in shock. "A…ano…"  
  
"Nani?" the golden-brown-eyed telekinetic asked.  
  
Bombay blinked innocently before pulling Nagi against him, crushing the other teen's mouth with his own. His eyes went wide for a moment, then drifted shut as he surrendered himself to Omi's kiss.  
  
Tot gagged. "NO! That's not RIGHT! It's SICK! Boys are supposed to like GIRLS!"  
  
"O~k. Well… um… let's play a game. Omi, let the boy breathe… For heaven's sake, don't suck his face off!" Manx moaned, trying to get everyone under control.  
  
Farfie pulled the lollipop from his mouth. "What do you have in mind?"  
  
"How about 'Pin the Tail on the Donkey'?" Birman suggested sweetly.  
  
~ 


	6. Pin the Tail on the Donkey

Disclaimer: I don't own them. I haven't seen all of Weiß Kreuz so I'm taking many creative liberties with this. Because of this, many characters... *cough* AYA ...may experience mild to severe cases of OOC- ness.  
  
"blah" = spoken  
  
//blah// = thought  
  
/blah/ = telepathy  
  
BLAH = shouted  
  
  
  
  
  
~  
  
All eyes were on her as Brad asked the question that was forming in everyone's mind. "You want us to play WHAT?!"  
  
Omi rolled his eyes and muttered, "Well, that killed the mood real quick."  
  
"No, really! It'll be fun. I promise." Birman replied, swiping Schuldig's headband.  
  
"HEY! Give that back!"  
  
She held it out of the German's reach. "I'm gonna borrow it for a little bit. You'll get it back later."  
  
Schu sank down in a chair and sulked, every-so-often swearing at Birman under his breath.  
  
"So? Who wants to play?"  
  
"Count me out."  
  
"Me too."  
  
"That's for children."  
  
"Ain't gonna happen."  
  
"Nope."  
  
"When pigs fly."  
  
"When Takatori apologizes!"  
  
"We're SO not playing that." (Schrient can be so girly sometimes... )  
  
"Does it hurt God?"  
  
Manx moaned and buried her face in her hands.  
  
"If it does, I'll play."  
  
Sighing, Birman shot back, "All it is, is taking a tail, and trying to pin it to the Donkey's rear while blindfolded. See? It's not that complicated."  
  
"Pins? As in sharp? And pointy?"  
  
"YES."  
  
"I'm playing!"  
  
The two women got everything set up and turned Farfie loose on the Donkey. Within a few minutes, he was seriously having a blast.  
  
"Take that, Donkey! And that! And that!" he cried, jabbing it over and over with the "tails".  
  
Tot watched him, curiosity brimming in her eyes. "Can I play?"  
  
Farfie grinned. "Sure! Let's hurt God together!"  
  
"YAY!" she squealed.  
  
Nagi covered his ears to shut out the sound of her annoying voice.  
  
"Nagi, wanna do something?" Omi whispered.  
  
"Like what?"  
  
"Well, we could…"  
  
Brad cut in before Omi could finish his thought. "Stay where we can see you."  
  
"WHAT?!" they exclaimed simultaneously, staring at the precog in horror.  
  
"Play a video game or something," Schu added. "And 'Let's get Nagi undressed' isn't an option right now, Tsukiyono."  
  
Omi bit his lip and kept his eyes on the floor. He could feel the colour rushing to his face. //Please don't let Aya say anything, please don't let Aya say anything…//  
  
Aya arched an eyebrow. "Omi? Care to explain what he meant by that?"  
  
"Aya!" Ken gasped.  
  
"Are you an idiot?" Schu asked, smirking. "The Kitten and Nagi are like this," he said, crossing his fingers.  
  
Violet eyes widened.  
  
"You didn't know?" Yoji sounded confused. "Man, even I knew and I'm not around him near as much as you and Ken are."  
  
"Shut up, Tarzan-boy," Aya snapped.  
  
Manx, who was involved in a conversation about all things female with Birman and Schrient (minus Tot), decided to take matters into her own hands.  
  
"That's it. I've had it. Aya, go play with Farfarello and Tot."  
  
"NO!"  
  
//Time to pull out the big guns…// She fished around in her purse a moment, pulled out a life-sized face-only picture, and taped it over the Donkey's head. "There. Sick 'em."  
  
His eyes narrowed as he stared at the image superimposed over the Donkey: a picture of Takatori Reiji. Aya immediately jumped up, grabbing a tail from Farfie and joining them in the game. Ken, who was watching the redhead like a hawk, followed him.  
  
Omi and Nagi, bored out of their minds and broadcasting it straight to Schu who was going stir-crazy, sighed and walked over to where the two psychos and Tot were busy taking turns stabbing the poor Donkey. "Can we play?"  
  
Tot grinned and gave each of them a tail.  
  
Manx smiled to herself and re-joined the girls' conversation. //Six down, three to go… I think I'll let them join in on their own. At least the whiniest ones are busy… //  
  
For a while, everything was going alright… then things started to heat up a bit.  
  
Tot kept trying to squeeze herself in between Nagi and Omi to keep them apart. Ken was flirting ceaselessly with Aya who was currently making Farfie's berserker tendencies look sane. Farfie laughed every time someone stuck a pin in the Donkey, exclaiming, "Take that!" Omi was trying to keep from pinning the tail on Tot. Nagi was telekinetically shoving her across the room, only to have the parasitic wench latch onto him again. All the while, at least one of them was blindfolded with Schu's bandana and aiming for the Takatori-faced Donkey.  
  
"Excuse me," Brad said, annoyance evident in his voice. He took his glasses off and pulled the pin free from between the frame and lens, shoving it back at a now un-blindfolded Aya. "I'm NOT the Donkey."  
  
Aya shrugged and walked away. "Sure could've fooled me," he mumbled.  
  
"I heard that!"  
  
"So what?"  
  
*growls* "Oh, that does it," Brad stormed toward the little group. "I'm playing. Watch your back, Fujimiya."  
  
The game resumed, this time with Aya keeping a close eye on Crawford.  
  
Yoji and Schuldig looked from the game to each other and back.  
  
"Are you thinking what I'm…"  
  
"I can read your mind, Kudou. I know EXACTLY what you're thinking."  
  
They joined in.  
  
"OW! I SAID I'M NOT THE DONKEY!" Brad shouted as Aya pinned him for the second time. He threw the tail on the floor and rubbed his nose.  
  
"Damn," came the response when Aya removed the headband from his eyes. "I was aiming for your mouth."  
  
"You're dead."  
  
On Ken's turn, Schu telepathically steered him into the bathroom. His tail was stuck in the plaster above the toilet. Tot ended up outside when she got a little too touchy-feely-clingy on Nagi, rope and duct tape holding her to a lamppost courtesy of Omi. Brad and Aya had given up on the Donkey and were trying to stick each other with the tails. Yoji was giving Farfie beauty tips while Farf stabbed himself with the pins. Schu was telepathically sending a blindfolded Ken on "wild goose chases", laughing hysterically when he pinned tails on random objects from the girls to the coffee table. Omi and Nagi, their tails lying forgotten on the floor, were engaged in a full-blown make-out session.  
  
It didn't take long for Manx and Birman to break it all up and the guys were forced to quit. After getting everything cleaned up from that one, and sending Omi out to apologize and untie Tot, Manx decided they should try a less-violent game.  
  
"How about Musical Chairs?" she asked, hoping that they'd be able to keep from killing each other… and that Omi and Nagi would be able to keep their hands off each other.  
  
She was met with glares, and an assortment of confused and terrified looks.  
  
"OKAY!" Farfie yipped. "I get to pick the music!"  
  
Seven bodies launched at him in an attempt to bring him down. "NOOOOOOOOOOOO!"  
  
~ 


	7. Musical Chairs

"I think I'm gonna have to sterilize my stereo by the time the night's out," Omi mumbled as the sounds of Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen's sing-along filled the air.  
  
Aya tripped over Ken who had stopped the seemingly endless circle around the remaining four chairs. "Ken! Keep moving!"  
  
"If I have to hear these girls any longer…" he complained.  
  
Just then, the "music" stopped and the five players fought tooth-and-nail for a seat.  
  
Schuldig smirked, watching Ken pick himself up from the ground.  
  
"Aw. Poor baby. Looks like you're out, Hidaka."  
  
"I hope your suspenders break."  
  
Brad looked up from where he sat with Yoji, Tot, and Farfie in the designated "Loser's Row" and moved over, making room for the brunette.  
  
"Don't worry. Schuldig won't last much longer."  
  
The music started up again and the boys continued their trek to nowhere. When it stopped again, they dove for the chairs.  
  
"Omi, move. NOW," Aya snarled, glaring at the youngest Weiß member.  
  
"Okay, okay…"  
  
"Omi! Here! Saved you a seat!"  
  
"Nagi! That's not fair! You aren't allowed to LIE across them!"  
  
"You're just mad 'cos you're out."  
  
Yoji laughed and moved down to give the telepath a place to sit.  
  
"Manx?" Ken whined. "Can you PLEASE change the music? I don't think I can take much more of this…"  
  
"LEMME PICK IT!" Farfie cried, jumping from his seat.  
  
A collective moan went up from the group.  
  
"At least there isn't anything that's WORSE than Mary-Kate and Ashley," Omi chirped.  
  
"Get ready!"  
  
The boys eyed each other, sizing up their opponents when suddenly…  
  
"YO, I'LL TELL YA WHAT I WANT, WHAT I REALLY REALLY WANT!"  
  
Omi sweatdropped. "But there are things that are just as bad…"  
  
Schu chuckled as Omi began wandering mindlessly away from the group towards the bathroom. /*chanting* That's right. You gotta go. Doesn't matter if you lose, cos you really gotta go… Damn! Now I hafta go!/ The blonde shook his head and ran back to the group circling the chairs as Schu made for the bathroom.  
  
"IF YOU WANNA BE MY" *click*  
  
Nagi sank down into a chair curling his fingers under the seat, his ankles around the legs, and telekinetically fused it to the floor. In short, he wasn't moving. Omi and Aya, on the other hand, started a fistfight over the last one.  
  
Yoji snagged a bowl of chips from the table and those on "Loser's Row" watched the fight as if it were Super Bowl Sunday.  
  
"Any bets?" Schu called, rejoining his fellow 'losers'. "Place your bets, folks, place your bets!"  
  
"Omi."  
  
/Chibi, you're too young to bet./  
  
"Aya. Omi seduced MY boyfriend."  
  
"Aya."  
  
"Prodigy was never yours, Tot. Omi."  
  
"I HAVE A NAME, YOU BEE-HIVE HAIRED BITCH!"  
  
"Nagi! I SAID DON'T SWEAR!"  
  
"Um, can we get back to the bets here?"  
  
"Oh. Sorry. Aya, since I've already foreseen it."  
  
"Aya. Beating up children hurts God."  
  
"Aya"  
  
"Sorry, Manx. Omi may be smaller and faster, but Aya's better in close…"  
  
*CRACK*  
  
Schuldig paled. "No more bets! Betting is closed! Kudou, you may want to get some ice…"  
  
"Aya-kun! That HURT!"  
  
All eyes were on the fighters.  
  
Omi sat on the floor, rubbing his head. Nagi was practically drooling - sometime during the fight, Omi's sheet had come undone, the deep blue material pooled at his hips. Aya stood over him, chair in hand. He'd smacked Omi over the head with it.  
  
"You're out, Omittchi," Yoji cooed, handing him an ice pack.  
  
Bombay looked to his lover, "Take him DOWN, Nagi."  
  
Nagi glanced at Aya and cringed. //Oh shit…//  
  
"MUSIC CHANGE!" Farfie shouted and switched CDs.  
  
Ken rocked back and forth, head down, hands clasped as if praying, repeating over and over, "Please don't let him have anything worse than the Olsen twins and Spice Girls…"  
  
"OH BABY, BABY. HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW…"  
  
That was all it took for Ken to lock himself in the bathroom, punctuating the song with loud bangs as he hit his forehead against the wall.  
  
Brad perched his glasses atop his head and watched him go, "Someone up there must seriously have it out for him."  
  
~  
  
Nagi bolted, trying to keep as much distance between himself and the agitated redhead as possible. //I'mgonnadieI'mgonnadieI'mgonnadie// After witnessing Aya's last performance, he was beginning to wonder whether or not he should LET him win… and he was having a hard time coming up with reasons not to.  
  
Aya glared at the little telekinetic. There was no way he was letting the kid win. He'd already dealt with Omi, and the others had taken care of themselves, which left the two of them.  
  
"I MUST CONFESS, MY LONELINESS IS KILLING ME…"  
  
The song played on with Farf making no move to stop it. Those on the "Row" watched the game play out, all of them on the edge of their seats with the exception of Ken who was still trying to bludgeon himself into unconsciousness, and Omi who was too dizzy to sit up. Even the girls had paused in their conversation to see how it would end.  
  
Three songs later…  
  
"Just stop the music already! I'm getting dizzy!" Nagi begged, his footsteps wavering as he fought to stay in a semi-straight line.  
  
"YOU DRIVE ME…" *click*  
  
"Thank you!"  
  
Neither boy moved toward the chair. They simply stood there and stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity.  
  
Finally, Nagi sighed and walked toward the "Loser's Row."  
  
"You still have to end up on the chair or it's a draw," Manx informed a stunned Aya.  
  
He shrugged and walked over to the chair, only to have it move away from him. He tried again with the same results. And again, and again, until he was racing around the room chasing what should've been an inanimate object.  
  
Nagi giggled. "If he wants to win so badly, he can work for it."  
  
After nearly an hour of watching the redhead chasing and swearing at a chair that was always just out of reach, Nagi took pity on him and put it down.  
  
"That *pant* wasn't *pant* fair!"  
  
"Fairs are for tourists, Aya. Just be glad that Chibi was nice enough to stop," Schu chided.  
  
Aya let go of the chair and fell over from exhaustion.  
  
"Maybe we should play something a little less strenuous?" Brad suggested, getting a nod of approval from Omi. "And perhaps someone should check and see if Ken is still alive in there…"  
  
"So. Whadda we do now?" Yoji asked curiously.  
  
"How about *gasp* 'Let the Injured *pant* and Exhausted Rest'?"  
  
"That's boring," Tot whined. "I wanna do something FUN!"  
  
Omi moaned. He already had a headache from being smashed in the head with a chair. Tot's "lovely" voice wasn't helping any. "Tot. You wanna get up close and personal with the lamppost again?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Then shut up."  
  
Birman decided enough was enough and picked up an empty bowl, a sheet of paper, and a pen. "I'm writing everyone's names down and drawing one from each group until there's four groups of three."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Since we have two injured and one passed-out on the floor…"  
  
"I'm not passed-out, I'm catching my breath!"  
  
"Whatever. Anyway, I figure now would be a good time for everyone to go out and get some air."  
  
Ken was confused. "Um, Birman? What do you mean 'go out and get some air'? Why do we need groups for that?"  
  
"It's a scavenger hunt."  
  
~ 


	8. The Scavenger Hunt part 1

The groups were drawn with one person from each team in them. As Birman called out the names, Manx passed the lists out, one to each group.  
  
"Okay, the first group will be... Omi... Tot... and Nagi... Um, can I get a re-draw? Either they'll kill each other or spend the whole three hours making out!"  
  
"NO!" the boys cried in unison. "No re-draws!"  
  
"FINE! Ok, group two. Farfarello, Yoji, and Hell. Group three. Ken, Schuldig, and Schoen. The last group is Aya, Brad, and Neu."  
  
Manx laughed. "Face it, Birman. The whole reason we drew names was to keep the fights and make-out sessions to a minimum. The only group we may not have to worry about is Farfie's."  
  
Turning back to the groups, Manx explained the rules.  
  
"Each of you were given a list."  
  
"But my group only got one," Yoji remarked.  
  
"Shut up and let me finish. You are to legally acquire everything on the list and return back here within three hours. The first to come up with the most items... won't have to play in the next game. Good luck. "  
  
With a collective sigh, the twelve of them walked out into the warm summer night air.  
  
"Well, I guess the sooner we start, the sooner we can get back here..." Ken muttered.  
  
Aya flashed the others a vicious smile. "Just so long as you don't start thinking that you have a chance in hell..."  
  
"We'll see about that!" Nagi yipped.  
  
They parted ways, each group confident that they would come out on top. No one wanted to see what sort of other games Manx and Birman had in mind.  
  
~  
  
Brad sighed and looked to Aya who had the paper crumbled up in his fist. "Okay. What's the first thing on the list?"  
  
"Um..." Violet eyes scanned the page. "A license plate starting with 'E'."  
  
The precog went pale. "MY CAR!" He started towards his BMW, Aya and Neu on his heels, only to find that the plate was still intact. "Okay, someone get me a screwdri... nevermind, there should be one in the glove compartment."  
  
Aya fished through it until he came up with said object and passed it to Brad, promptly pulling it away when he reached for it.  
  
"Do you WANT to partake of whatever else those wenches have planned?" Brad asked dryly.  
  
Aya handed it over.  
  
"The two of you are going to have to work together if you want to beat the others," Neu smirked.  
  
The men glared at each other.  
  
Neu rolled her eyes. "What's next, Abyssinian?"  
  
"Three pieces of cat food."  
  
"CAT FOOD?!" Brad yelped. "What sort of fucked up game IS this?!"  
  
Aya paused. "I know where I can get some. You and Neu can look for the next items."  
  
"Why don't we just make two more copies of the list?"  
  
"You know, the girl's got a point..."  
  
The three waited patiently as Brad scribbled down two more copies.  
  
"This way," Neu explained, "we don't have to wait for someone to read what's next."  
  
Crawford skimmed over the remaining objects as the trio walked off in search of cat food.  
  
"Four sakura blossoms..."  
  
"On it!" Aya ran back to the Koneko.  
  
"But... what about... the cat food? Oh well... an American penny... there's one in my wallet... a picture of a police officer..."  
  
"I'll get that," Neu replied.  
  
Aya returned with the blossoms, cat food, and a box.  
  
"The box is to put everything in so we don't have our hands full," he informed them. "What's next?"  
  
"Neu went to get a picture of a cop. Next is... a box of Pocky, a bottle of Freude, anything Disney, a yaoi doujinshi, a movie ticket stub, a parking ticket, a credit card, and a picture of anything but the previously listed items."  
  
"The doujinshi is easy. Omi has tons of those. The parking ticket... Yoji's glove compartment is full. I have a credit card... but I have no clue about the others."  
  
"Alright, you get those. I'll see what I can find and whatever's left... let's pray Neu can find them."  
  
~  
  
"So... what are we looking for next?"  
  
"Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"  
  
"SHUT UP! If we get caught because of you, I'm going to telekinetically put you in orbit!"  
  
"Um, Nagi, I thought Manx said we had to do this LEGALLY."  
  
"What they don't know won't hurt them."  
  
*sigh* "I hope you know what you're doing..."  
  
"Almost... got it... Okay, I got it. Now run."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"HEY! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU KIDS THINK YOU'RE DOING? GET AWAY FROM MY CAR BEFORE I CALL THE COPS!"  
  
"That's why."  
  
"Oh."  
  
A few blocks later...  
  
"So *pant* Omi... what's next *gasp*?"  
  
"Hmm... *wheeze* cat food."  
  
"WHAT?!"  
  
"It says 'Three pieces of cat food'. There's some back at the Koneko, but I don't want to go that far..."  
  
"I wonder... Tot."  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"Can you find us three pieces of cat food? You know... the stuff kitties eat?"  
  
"Nagi wants kitties?"  
  
"No, not kitties... kitty FOOD. What a kitty EATS."  
  
"Oh..." Tot paused, puzzled for a moment. "Okay!"  
  
The boys watched as the green haired girl scampered away.  
  
"Nagi, do you really think we can trust her?"  
  
"I hope so... Heaven help us, I hope so."  
  
~  
  
"Just my luck that I'd get stuck with YOU," Schoen muttered, glaring at Ken.  
  
"You think I'm enjoying this?! If it had been up to me, I'd be in Aya's group!"  
  
Schuldig rolled his eyes. "Will the two of you knock it off? I don't want to put up with this for the next three hours. And if I have to, you're both going to wish you were dead."  
  
Ken immediately started taking stock of their inventory. "Lessee. we got the license plate, the doujinshi, Freude, and the parking ticket. Where in the world are we going to find an American penny?"  
  
"You're so stupid! How could they possibly stick me with you?!"  
  
"I don't see YOU helping out here, scarface," the brunette snapped irritably.  
  
"WHY YOU LITTLE..."  
  
"Both of you SHUT UP!"  
  
Schoen and Ken continued bickering, ignoring Schuldig.  
  
"Alright... that does it... Schoen, go find an American penny. Siberian, get three pieces of cat food."  
  
"HEY!" They stared at Schu with expressions akin to shock.  
  
"Just go before I decide to mention to Manx that neither of you helped gather any of these."  
  
"Going!" Schoen disappeared around a corner.  
  
"Gone!" Ken sprinted down the street.  
  
The telepath sighed. "Why did I get stuck with idiots?"  
  
"ITAI!"  
  
"Make that clumsy idiots..."  
  
~  
  
"OH MY GOD!"  
  
"PUT SOME CLOTHES ON!"  
  
"Isn't that indecent exposure?"  
  
"MY EYES!"  
  
Yoji looked around as people ran for cover.  
  
Farfarello laughed. "Don't worry about them. All that matters is that you're hurting God dressed like that."  
  
"Is there anything... Um... Are you... wearing anything... under that?" Hell asked softly.  
  
"What?! And risk having the world see my underwear?! Absolutely not!"  
  
"I think I'm going to be sick... Farfarello, have we found ANYTHING on that list yet?"  
  
"Nope!"  
  
"Are either of you even LOOKING?"  
  
"Nope! These games hurt God, so I wanna keep playing."  
  
Hell moaned. "Somebody shoot me..."  
  
~ 


	9. The Scavenger Hunt part 2

"All that's left is a bottle of Freude, and they haven't made that since that 'disease' made headlines a few months ago," Neu sighed.  
  
Aya's head snapped up. "What?!"  
  
The girl froze. "Um..."  
  
"Repeat that."  
  
"I SAID that there hasn't been any Freude made in months because it was linked to that 'disease'."  
  
Abyssinian's eyes widened.  
  
Brad stared at him as if he'd finally lost it.  
  
"Ken... He was dating that girl... The one who was hooked on the stuff... Stupid bitch... Ken's mine..." He drifted off into meaningless babble.  
  
"So," Brad interjected, "He'd have some of the stuff?"  
  
"Only one way to find out..."  
  
"I hate that woman... She doesn't deserve Ken... I hope her plane..."  
  
*sigh* "HEY, GUYS!"  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"Obnoxious, overbearing... What?"  
  
They stared as Brad jumped onto the hood of a nearby car, struck a pose, and shouted, "TO KEN'S!"  
  
Neu gave an annoyed sigh. "Here we go again..."  
  
Aya was thrilled at the prospect of getting to invade Ken's room and be able to blame it on a game so he wouldn't get his ass kicked. "YAY!"  
  
They hurried off into the night.  
  
~  
  
"Hmmm... He said he wanted... Uh-oh... What was it again? I don't remember... Something about kitties... Kitty feet? Kitty treats? Kitty... pleats? I don't know! Ooh, he's gonna be mad at me... Maybe if I ask that nice man over there wearing the ski mask... Wait, he looks like he has his hands full with that TV set... What am I going to do?"  
  
Several blocks away...  
  
"Why did we get stuck with Tot?"  
  
"'Cos that's how Birman pulled the names."  
  
*sigh*  
  
"Omi?"  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"This sucks."  
  
"Tell me about it."  
  
"We're gonna get stuck playing the rest of their games."  
  
"Looks like."  
  
"Omi?"  
  
"Wha."  
  
Cerulean eyes widened in shock as the smaller boy drew him in for a kiss.  
  
"Mmph. Nagi. mmm. what if. ah. someone sees us?"  
  
The telekinetic pulled back, arching an eyebrow in disdain, his honey-brown eyes dark with longing.  
  
"So what. Let 'em."  
  
"What if Tot comes back?"  
  
Nagi nearly choked in an attempt to keep from laughing. "Comes back? Omi, she has the I.Q. of a burrito. She's not coming back."  
  
However, Omi was still skeptical. "But what if she. Oh god, Nagi!"  
  
"Hm?" The slender fingers trailing lazy patterns along Omi's inner thigh stopped as Nagi waited to hear what the blonde had to say. Omi's eyes were closed, his lips slightly parted, breath coming in short ragged gasps, fingers tangled in Nagi's brown hair.  
  
"D-don't st. Nagi!"  
  
"Well, if that's what you really want." He started to back away from him, but Omi was still clinging to his hair like a lifeline. "Um. let go?"  
  
Blue eyes looked almost hurt. "What'd I do?"  
  
"You said 'don't'."  
  
"No I didn't."  
  
"Oh? In that case." The telekinetic reached up and began playing with the loose ends of Omi's sheet. "Awfully nice of them to make this a toga party."  
  
"Huh? Why? I thought the idea was stupid."  
  
"It is. but."  
  
"But what?"  
  
"Lemme finish! You, me, we both have blankets. and not much else. we're alone. .and we've been interrupted every other time." Nagi unfastened the cloth tied at Omi's shoulder, taking the ends in his hands and drawing him closer. "Why don't we finish what we started?"  
  
A bright smile and a long, passionate kiss was his reply.  
  
~  
  
"Where'd he go? I got what he asked for, but I can't find him!" Ken was beginning to get annoyed with the telepath. He'd been wandering around for the past fifteen minutes trying to find at least one member of his group, but with no success.  
  
//When I find him, he's gonna get it. He should've at least said where he'd be, but n~o. Mr. High-and-Mighty-look-at-me-I'm-cool decides to split!//  
  
Ken sighed and ran down the next street hoping to run into Schuldig at some point in time.  
  
~  
  
"Why did I get stuck with him? It isn't fair! Why couldn't it have been that idiot Tarzan. or the psychotic redhead. or even the sex-crazed blonde? Why did it have to be the klutz? Ok. I got what he wanted. now where did he run off to?" Schoen had returned to the spot where they'd separated, only to find that there was no one there. "This is getting annoying."  
  
//If I end up playing any more stupid games because of them.//  
  
She turned the corner and started down the street.  
  
*crash*  
  
"ITAI!"  
  
"You IDIOT! You stupid clumsy IDIOT!"  
  
"Hey! YOU'RE the one who ran into ME!"  
  
"Don't flatter yourself! If I ran into you, it would have been with a sharp object in my hands!  
  
*grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr* "Um. have you seen Schuldig?"  
  
"No. I'm guessing that you haven't either?"  
  
"Nope."  
  
"This is just GREAT! He sends us off, then he LEAVES! And now I'm STUCK WITH YOU!"  
  
"Shut up already. Things could be worse. We could be with Farfarello."  
  
".. True."  
  
Ken picked himself up and held out a hand toward Schoen. "Truce? At least until we find him?"  
  
She sighed and accepted the outstretched hand. "Truce. for now."  
  
The two of them started off to find the missing telepath.  
  
~  
  
Schuldig rolled his eyes. He'd been standing in the same area for nearly a half hour. So far, there was no sign of Ken or Schoen. //Did they get lost? Probably. stupid idiots. I suppose I should go find them.//  
  
/Alright morons. where'd you run off to?/  
  
~  
  
They stopped when they heard him.  
  
"What do you mean 'Where'd we run off to'?! We've been looking for YOU!"  
  
/I'm right where I was before and you don't have to talk. I can read your thoughts, you know./  
  
Schoen continued on as if she hadn't heard a word he'd said. "Where the hell are you?"  
  
/Standing outside Siberian's apartment building. you know. the same spot where we split up.//  
  
"So then I."  
  
/Went the wrong way. Hurry up and get back here so we can finish this. I do NOT want to play any more of their sadistic 'party games'. We've only got an hour and fifteen minutes left, kiddies./  
  
Ken grabbed Schoen's wrist and raced off in the direction of the apartments.  
  
A few streets later.  
  
"It's about time!" Schu snapped. "I was almost beginning to wonder if I should go after you."  
  
"Excuse me. LET ME GO! We found him so the truce is off."  
  
The brunette mumbled something under his breath.  
  
"What?!"  
  
"Nothing. Let's just get this over with."  
  
"Knock it off," Schu hissed. "We've got company."  
  
~  
  
"Oh for the love of. I don't care if you have to break into a department store! PUT SOME CLOTHES ON!" Hell was beginning to hate her group.  
  
"He doesn't have to. Nudity hurts God."  
  
"Shut up! I'm tired of hearing that! God this! God that! It that all you care about?!"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Why me. This can't possibly get any worse."  
  
"Um, Farf, Hell? . My string broke."  
  
"TAKE THAT, GOD!"  
  
~ 


	10. Scavenging complications

"Hold it right there!" Crawford shouted. "We'll be taking that bottle."  
  
"Get your own! This one's ours!" Schuldig shot back.  
  
The other four watched as their "leaders" began a screaming match over who had the rights to Ken's bottle of Freude.  
  
"I don't see your name on it!"  
  
"Fine! Anybody got a pen?"  
  
*grrrrrrrrrrrrrr* "GIMME THAT!"  
  
"AIEEEEEEEEEE! GET OFF ME!"  
  
"NO! OW! WATCH THE GLASSES!"  
  
"HEY! THAT'S MY HAIR!"  
  
Neither one noticed when the bottle Schu had been holding fell to the ground and rolled to a stop at Ken's feet.  
  
"Hey, what's this doing here? I guess Schuldig must've dropped it. Oh well. You're safe now, little bottle. I won't let those bad men take you away from me ever again." The brunette cradled the bottle of water in his arms like a child, cooing happily.  
  
Crawford stopped trying to rip Schu's hair out long enough to shout orders to his comrades. "SOMEBODY GET THAT BOTTLE! OUR SANITY'S ON THE LINE!"  
  
Aya smirked and walked toward Ken, his voice taking on an entirely different quality. "Ken-chan."  
  
Brown eyes widened at the sound of his friend's voice. //K-Ken-CHAN?! Great... NOW he decides to start acting all sexy-like...//  
  
"Ken-chan," he repeated, "can I borrow that for a moment? He's *gesturing toward Crawford* been making me run all over the place and I'm SO tired and SO thirsty... *pouts* Onegai, Ken-chan?"  
  
//Oh. My. GOD! Why now?! Why does he have to be doing this NOW?! I know I shouldn't... but if I don't, then he might think I hate him... but if I DO, then Schuldig will be mad... It's only WATER... It can't hurt anything... right?// Ken bit his lip and handed the bottle to Aya, his hands shaking. //Wait! It's Freude! What if he gets sick? Oh SHIT!//  
  
"Gomen, Aya-kun. I can't let you have this. It might make you sick." He snatched it back, hugging the bottle tightly to his chest.  
  
The redhead put his head down, hands clasped behind his back, grinding the toe of his boot into the pavement. "Demo... Ken-chan..." His voice trembled as if he were on the verge of tears.  
  
Crawford, Schuldig, Schöen and Neu stared. Aya was definitely not being himself... or maybe he finally was...  
  
Ken sighed. "Fine... but just a little. Otherwise you might get sick." The bottle was handed over.  
  
"NO! YOU IDIOT!" Schu and Schöen shrieked.  
  
Violet eyes lit up as the container was entrusted to him. "Arigatou, Ken- chan." He flashed him a bright, genuine smile before pressing his mouth against Ken's in a soft, playful kiss.  
  
"JA NE!" Aya bolted down the street, Crawford and Neu trailing behind.  
  
"Um... why did you just hand over our ticket OUT OF THESE GAMES?!" Schu snarled, grabbing Ken by the shoulders and shaking him roughly.  
  
"It's okay... really. I have more. I promise." The brunette was still in shock over Aya's little... display.  
  
"Then go get it."  
  
Ken trudged back to his apartment, fished around in a box labeled "Stuff I Plan On Getting Rid Of Someday", found the other bottle and an old Polaroid, and rejoined his group.  
  
"See? I SAID I had more. Oh, I found an old Polaroid photo, too"  
  
Schoen arched an eyebrow at the Freude. "Why exactly do you have this stuff in the first place?"  
  
"A... memento from an old girlfriend."  
  
"YOU had a GIRLFRIEND? Was she BLIND?"  
  
"Shut up."  
  
"Make me."  
  
"Both of you shut up. This bickering is getting on my nerves."  
  
"We lost didn't we?" Schoen asked.  
  
"No. They may have gotten the Freude, but I got a few things off Crawford," Schu held up the pilfered items: Aya's credit card, Pocky, and a picture of a police officer. "This oughta teach 'em..."  
  
"So..." Schoen sidled up to Ken. "What's the picture of?"  
  
"N-nothing..."  
  
"Lemme see! Why the HELL do you have a picture of Abyssinian?!"  
  
"Schoen, leave Siberian alone." /So how DID you get that picture?/  
  
/None of your business./  
  
/Fine, fine... but I hope you don't mind him seeing it.../  
  
/WHAT?!/  
  
"Well, children, lets go. The night is still young and we have three things left to find!" The telepath trotted down the street, his "companions" chasing after him.  
  
~  
  
"Impressive. I didn't expect you of all people to be capable of manipulating someone's mind and heart like that."  
  
"I didn't manipulate him."  
  
"Did you see the look on his face when you kissed him?"  
  
"SHUT UP!"  
  
"For a moment, it seemed like he was going to have a heart attack!"  
  
"I SAID SHUT UP, CRAWFORD!"  
  
*sigh* "Men... can't live with 'em, and if you kill 'em, it's life."  
  
"HEY! I RESENT THAT!" Crawford and Aya cried, rounding on Neu.  
  
"Um... guys... *sifting through the box* We're missing some things..."  
  
Crawford paused. "Oh? Like what?"  
  
"Hmmm... Abyssinian's credit card..."  
  
"WHAT?!?!"  
  
"... the Pocky..."  
  
"Nagi's going to kill me..."  
  
"... and the ...picture... of ... NO! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA OF WHAT I WENT THROUGH TO GET THAT PICTURE?! AND NOW IT'S GONE!"  
  
Aya moaned. "Schuldig. I bet he took them while the two of you were trying to rip each other apart..."  
  
"WHY THAT DIRTY LITTLE... Aya, Asuka... this means war."  
  
~  
  
"Kitty poo? Kitty fur? Kitty litter? Kitty toys? Why didn't he write it down? Hey! Isn't that. Yup! I'll just ask him! NAGI!"  
  
~  
  
"Oh no. Tell me I'm hearing things. Tell me I'm going crazy. Tell me whatever you want. but please don't say that that... THING... found it's way back."  
  
"Um, Nagi? The burrito's back."  
  
"Quick! Play dead and maybe it'll go away."  
  
The boys dropped to the ground and tried their best to remain motionless... but it had already seen them.  
  
"NAGI! I don't remember what you wanted me to get. Nagi? Are you dead?"  
  
"Yes, Tot. I'm dead."  
  
"Ew... why are you dead with him? OH! I know! Hell says that when someone's dead you give them mouth to mouth and they come back to life!"  
  
"NO! I'M NOT DEAD! SEE? I'M ALIVE!" He jumped up and nearly tripped over Omi in his haste to get away from Tot.  
  
Omi wrinkled his nose in disgust. "I knew there was a reason I don't like burritos."  
  
*sniffle* "I don't remember what it was you wanted, Nagi."  
  
"How hard is it to remember cat food?"  
  
"Kitty food?"  
  
"YES! Kitty food. Kitties eat kitty food! I asked you to get kitty FOOD!"  
  
"Oh. Okay!" The green-haired girl spun around and skipped away, singing off- key as she went. "Kitty food, kitty food, kitty kitty kitty food!"  
  
Nagi buried his face in his hands. "I am really hating my life..."  
  
~  
  
"Um... I really don't want to hold this up all night... Something? Anything? String? Wire? A belt? Somebody? Please?"  
  
Farfarello grinned. "Just take it off. That way, God will REALLY suffer."  
  
"NO! ANYTHING BUT THAT!" Hell shrieked. "Here! You can have my hair ribbon! Keep it! I don't ever want it back!"  
  
Yoji stared at her in shock. Was he hearing things? Did she really want him to keep his clothes ON? //Wow. This is a first. Usually they want me to take 'em OFF.//  
  
"You're sure you don't want it back? Not even as a reminder of this 'wonderful' outing?"  
  
"I would rather eat both the box and contents Farfarello brought."  
  
One amber eye lit up. "Really?"  
  
"Yes, really. Now hurry up and tie that thing so we can get out of here."  
  
//I don't think she's a real female...// The thought flitted through the playboy's mind as he tied up his makeshift loincloth and the group continued on their way of not looking for anything written on the list.  
  
After a while, Hell sighed. "Can we at least look at what's on the list?"  
  
"Nope," Farf replied proudly.  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"I ate it."  
  
"You... ate... the list?"  
  
"Of course! Paper hurts God because it's made from trees, but not using it for its intended purpose hurts God even more."  
  
Hell and Yoji exchanged worried glances.  
  
"Why did we get stuck with him?"  
  
"Because someone is out to get us. Probably Birman."  
  
"LOOK! A PENNY! If you swallow them, it hurts God!"  
  
"I can't believe we still have an hour left. I think I'm going to jump off a bridge... or hang myself with my wire..."  
  
"No, let's just hang HIM."  
  
"Now we're talkin'. So, are you SURE you don't want your ribbon back?"  
  
~ 


	11. Plans

"I have to do WHAT?!"  
  
Aya had suddenly found himself wishing he were anywhere but standing on the street corner with his "teammates". Crawford had decided on a course of action to retrieve their stolen goods and the redhead was far from pleased with it.  
  
"All you have to do is lure that klutz away from Schuldig and Schöen. He's the one who's carrying everything. You shouldn't have a hard time getting our stuff off him. Hell, he'll probably willingly hand it over!"  
  
Neu arched an eyebrow. "You must have a lot of faith in his abilities if you're letting him have such an important task."  
  
"No, not really. The simpering idiot is so infatuated that he won't even realize what's happening until Aya's long gone."  
  
". Good point."  
  
Brad grinned, the sight making Aya cringe and back away from the American. He kept backing away until he felt cool stone against his back. //Oh shit. A corner. I backed myself into a corner. I don't want to do this! I CAN'T do this! He wants me to act all seductive toward my own teammate! I can't DO that! Wait. that's what I did earlier.// His thoughts cut off as he felt a sharp tug on his toga followed by cool air against his previously covered shoulder.  
  
"What the hell are you DOING?! HENTAI!"  
  
"Knock off, boy. If you're going to ACT sexy, you've got to LOOK sexy."  
  
He was at a total loss. Crawford was saying this?! //The guy's about as sexy as roadkill! But then again. with his glasses pushed up on his forehead like that, and wearing just a sheet. NO! What are you SAYING?! This is BRAD! He's NOT SEXY! ... Well. maybe just a little. Ok. so right now he's fucking gorgeous. but it won't last. This is Brad we're talking about. Bradley 'I've-got-a-stick-so-far-up-my-ass-it'll-never-see-the-light- of-day' Crawford. I do NOT like Brad. ... So why is my heart racing? I don't like him. do I?//  
  
The precog glanced up, arching an eyebrow at the stunned expression on the redhead's face. "Something wrong, Abyssinian?"  
  
"N-no. Nothing. Not a thing." Aya bit his lip. //He has blue eyes. I never noticed that before.//  
  
"Ri~ght. That's why your face is about as red as your hair and your eyes are dilated."  
  
"Great. I'm stuck with a sadistic American and a horny redhead."  
  
Two voices sounded as one, "WHAT?!"  
  
"I am NOT SADISTIC!"  
  
"I'm NOT HORNY!"  
  
Neu rolled her eyes and made a 'brush off' gesture. "Whatever. That's why Crawford is hell-bent on revenge and you look like you want to screw him senseless."  
  
Dark blue eyes widened. "What?"  
  
"Oh, just look at him! He's practically hyperventilating and. Aya. I think there is a law about indecent exposure."  
  
Abyssinian looked down at himself and moaned. His sheet had been twisted, tucked and tied to the point where it was leaving very little to the imagination. "I look like a cheap whore!"  
  
"Be glad you've got your boxers. Speaking of which."  
  
"SHUT UP! I happen to LIKE teddy bears!"  
  
"Yup, he's definitely gay." Brad muttered under his breath, averting his eyes. //As embarrassing and hard for him that this may be, I think I'M gonna have a hard time trying to keep myself from wanting to drag him off and fuck him into oblivion.// He looked back up. "Get that look off your face. You're supposed to be sexy, not scowling."  
  
"Sexy?! Try scandalous! If anyone sees this I *mmph* .!" Violet eyes widened in shock and terror as Crawford kissed him.  
  
"Showtime," he whispered, breaking away from him and disappearing with Neu into the shadows, leaving a sleazy Abyssinian to stand on the street corner.  
  
//I feel like a prostitute.//  
  
"AYA?!"  
  
//Here goes nothing.//  
  
~  
  
//Is that? No. can't be. it's just not possible . Aya?!//  
  
As he got closer, Ken realized that, sure enough, it WAS the stoic Weiß leader standing on the street corner.  
  
"AYA?! Aya, what happened? Where's your group? Are you alright?" //You've practically got "Fuck me" written all over you!//  
  
"I'm fine. They left me, so now I'm stuck trying to do all this on my own."  
  
Ken paused, taking in his friend's current state of dress. "So why are you dressed like that?"  
  
Aya rolled his eyes and sighed. "Long story and I don't feel like telling it."  
  
"Aya, you know you can tell me. I won't say a word to anyone else. I promise."  
  
In his mind, the redhead flashed back to an event just a few days ago - Aya vs. the sewing machine. Technically Ken hadn't told anyone, but he hadn't kept too quiet about it. //Can I really trust him?//  
  
"Aya."  
  
Again he made no attempt to speak.  
  
"Ran. onegai?"  
  
*sigh* "Fine, but it's long."  
  
"I don't mind."  
  
He paused momentarily before drawing a breath and launching into his explanation, talking at a pace Ken never would've believed possible for him. ". . . Okay . So first we were doing alright and finding everything then Brad said 'We need Freude' and Neu and I were like 'They don't make it anymore!' and Brad was like 'Find some!' and I remembered Yuriko and I was like 'Ken was dating this girl.' and Brad was like 'Quick! To Ken's!' and Neu was like 'Oh god, not again!' and I was like 'YAY!' and we ran all the way to the apartments and Brad and Schuldig were like ' It's mine!' and we were like 'Oh my god' and then I was like 'Please?' and you were like 'Okay' and I was like 'Thanks!' and then Neu was like 'We lost stuff' and Brad said 'What?!' and Neu was like 'Credit card, pocky, and picture of a cop' and Brad got mad and did this to me and they left me here and now I have to get everything on my own but I don't know where I'm gonna find the credit card, pocky and officer unless I mug someone and I don't wanna go to jail.'  
  
Eventually, the redhead was forced to breathe or pass out again from a lack of oxygen.  
  
Ken stared. Aya had just said more in that one sentence than he'd ever said in all the months they'd known each other. //He must really be worked up over this. Schöen and Schu gave me our stuff for safekeeping, but if I give it away, they'll be really mad. On the other hand, I can't let Aya do this all by himself. Decisions decisions. do I make my group mad or do I help the one I love?//  
  
Aya was getting antsy. His sheet was slipping from Crawford's intricate knots and twists, but he was afraid that if he tried to fix it, he'd only make it worse and end up flashing Ken. //Stupid Brad and his lame ideas. as if he'll actually fall for it.//  
  
He was stunned into complete silence when the brunette held something out to him. A box, a thin plastic card, and a photograph - the items that had been taken from them. Violet eyes widened.  
  
//I'd rather catch hell than leave him like this.// Ken's mind was made up.  
  
"Aya, are you going to be alright here? I mean. like that?"  
  
"I. I guess so."  
  
The sheet decided at that moment to get its revenge on Aya for the fiasco with the sewing machine, not to mention what he'd let Brad do. The knot holding his handiwork together loosened and let go. Swaths of violet silk slipped down pale skin. Both boys were wide eyed, but not for the same reason. Ken saw it as a dream come true. Aya, on the other hand, turned as red as his hair and wanted to crawl under a rock and die.  
  
He was still blushing furiously when Ken started giggling.  
  
"Sorry! It's just that. from before. you must really like teddy bears."  
  
He watched as Aya's deep violet eyes brimmed with tears.  
  
"Aya, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. but."  
  
Like a dam bursting from too much rainwater, the tears spilled down pale cheeks. Ken froze.  
  
"Oh god. Aya. I'm so sorry!"  
  
He closed the distance between them and held the sobbing redhead close. //Great Ken, now you've made him cry. I didn't think it would embarrass him so much. Then again, what's with him all of a sudden? He NEVER cried before. at least, I've never seen him cry.//  
  
Aya was in hysterics. His voice was choked and he was having a hard time getting the words out between sobs. "W-Why's *sob* everything *sniffle* h- hafta hap-pen *sob* t' me?!"  
  
Ken sighed and held the distraught redhead closer. His hands slid along ivory skin, his voice cooing soothingly, in an attempt to calm the other boy.  
  
~  
  
"Where did he run off to?" Schöen muttered as she and Schuldig wandered in search of their missing group member.  
  
Schu was livid. "He had all our stuff, too! When I get my hands on him. I trusted him! And what does he do? He takes off with everything!"  
  
Schöen paled and walked faster, trying to keep out of the telepath's way.  
  
"Why don't you try and find him telepathically?"  
  
"..." /Where are you, little kitty?/ . . . "DAMMIT!"  
  
"What is it? Is something wrong?"  
  
"He's with that Fujimiya brat!"  
  
"But he's not in our group. oh no."  
  
Schu tossed his head and moaned. "He gave everything to his boy-toy."  
  
"WHAT?!"  
  
Schuldig ran down the street intent on wringing Ken's neck, Schöen trailing him.  
  
~  
  
"Omi, did we manage to find ANYTHING?"  
  
"Since Tot hasn't come back again, just the license plate."  
  
"I was afraid of that. We have to play the rest of their games. Hey! Isn't that Ken? Who's that with hi. . Aya?"  
  
The two boys made their way to where Ken stood, still trying to comfort a sobbing Abyssinian.  
  
Nagi glanced at Omi, pointed to a few things lying forgotten on the ground, and whispered, "Our ticket out of this madness."  
  
The blonde nodded and silently retrieved the items. Glancing at his watch, he smiled and bounded back to where Nagi was hiding. "Fifteen more minutes and we get to go in!"  
  
"Should we tell them?" The telekinetic gestured toward the two oblivious boys.  
  
"Nah. Let them figure it out on their own."  
  
Omi and Nagi set out to find Tot and make their way back to the Koneko.  
  
~  
  
"For the millionth time, Yoji, I don't want it back!"  
  
"You're sure?"  
  
"YES!"  
  
"Okay. just so we're clear on this."  
  
Hell wanted to hit her head off a tree. "Crystal." She'd been listening to Farfarello's rantings and Yoji's questions for nearly forty minutes, and was beginning to question her own sanity.  
  
"Ooh! Look! We got fifteen more minutes to hurt God! Come, kitty-who's- clothes-hurt-God!"  
  
Yoji blinked. "Kitty-who's-clothes-hurt-God?"  
  
"I think he means your Tarzan gear."  
  
"Shut up! I'll have you know that this was all I could find!"  
  
"Uh huh, sure, riight."  
  
"It was either this or one of the sheets off my bed."  
  
She nearly gagged. It was common knowledge that the playboy of Weiß was an all-around slut. Hell didn't want to think of what might or might not be embedded in his sheets. Sighing, she looked to Farfarello who had started skipping while singing the Oscar Meyer Weiner song at the top of his lungs in an off-key falsetto. "Since we don't have much time left, can we head back to the Koneko?"  
  
The singing stopped. "Will you try my dessert?"  
  
"Sure, why not. As long as we head back NOW."  
  
"Okay!"  
  
The trio walked down the block, crossed the road and went inside, all the while listening to Farf's singing. They had never gotten very far in the first place. 


	12. Returning

Aya pulled away from Ken. "Um, isn't your group going to be worried about."  
  
"THERE YOU ARE!"  
  
Ken stared, wide-eyed as an enraged Schuldig and a frightened Schöen appeared. "Uh. Hi, guys!"  
  
"Don't 'Hi, guys!' me! We were looking EVERYWHERE for you! There's five minutes left of this stupid game and we are NOT participating in any more!"  
  
A voice from the other side of the street cut in. "Actually, we're all going to be playing."  
  
Schu's voice went deathly cold. "What?"  
  
Brad rolled his eyes. "While Hidaka here was trying to seduce our teammate, the kids ran off with our items."  
  
"You mean to tell me that you sat there and WATCHED while they ran off, and you didn't BOTHER trying to stop them?!" Aya snarled. //I knew it wouldn't last. He's back to his unsexy self.//  
  
/And you think Hidaka's sexy? Were you dropped on your head as a child? Are the teddy bears starting to get to you? Or maybe you've been a icicle for so long that you're grasping at the first thing that walks by?/  
  
//Shut up.//  
  
"Neu and I weren't here when it happened."  
  
Ken arched an eyebrow, taking into consideration that each was carrying a Styrofoam cup of coffee.  
  
Neu grinned. "Gotta love gas stations. Although, the attendant was giving us weird looks when we went in. You'd think he's never seen people wearing sheets before."  
  
"I foresaw it."  
  
"You predicted THAT?! A stupid, trivial, mundane event?"  
  
"Bite me, Schöen," Crawford snipped.  
  
Schu studied Ken for a moment. "Hidaka. why were you trying to strip Aya?"  
  
A deep blush tinted his tanned face. "I DIDN'T! Honest! That's how I found him!"  
  
"HEY!"  
  
"Okay, maybe not EXACTLY how I found him, but pretty close."  
  
"Riight."  
  
"Um, guys, we should be heading back now. There's two minutes left to this silly game. Since none of us has all the items, then it'll be a tie. The six of us won't have to play anything else."  
  
Brad yawned. "Neu's right. No sense in arguing if we're all going to get out of this anyway."  
  
After a long pause, the two teams trudged back to the Koneko.  
  
~  
  
They couldn't find her. They'd tried everything they could, even to the point of actually LOOKING, but she was nowhere to be found.  
  
"Let's face it, Nagi. We aren't going to find Tot."  
  
"I guess you're right. Head back?"  
  
"Fine by me."  
  
The boys abandoned their scarcely-could-be-called-half-hearted search and returned to the shop.  
  
Author's note: Sorry this took so long coming, but I just started college so I've been rather rushed as of late. I know there's no Yoji, Farfie, or Schreient wench in this part, but since everyone's trying to get back to the Koneko no Sumi Ie, and they weren't even two blocks away, they made it back a lot faster. I promise they'll be in the next part, and the mystery of Farfie's box will be revealed. 


	13. The Dessert

Omi and Nagi took one sweeping glance around the basement of the Koneko, their eyes falling on a familiar sea-green head.  
  
"What the hell are you doing here?" Omi asked his voice icy.  
  
"I couldn't find what Nagi wanted. I remembered that Weiß are kitties, so there would be kitty food where Weiß was. So I came back here."  
  
The boys looked from Tot to each other and back.  
  
"Well, you gotta admit, she DOES have a point." Nagi muttered.  
  
Yoji's voice piped up. "What took ya so long? We've been waiting for over fifteen minutes!"  
  
Manx sighed. "Well, let's see what everyone found."  
  
The groups set their items out on a table so the women could look through them.  
  
"Okay." Birman began calling out the items while Manx marked them off on the lists. "Omi's group: license plate, Pocky, policeman, and credit card."  
  
"HEY! THOSE WERE OURS! THEY STOLE 'EM!"  
  
"CRAWFORD, SHUT UP! KEN LEFT 'EM ON THE GROUND! FINDERS KEEPERS!"  
  
"Stupid blonde brat."  
  
Nagi glared at Brad. "Excuse me?"  
  
The precog looked away, "Nothing."  
  
"Brad's group: license plate, Freude, penny, cat food, blossoms, Disney movie, yaoi doujinshi, movie ticket stub, parking ticket, and a picture of . a moose? Why a moose?"  
  
"Don't look as us!" Neu stated, hands in the air, "It was Crawford's."  
  
"Whatever. Schuldig's team: Freude, cat food, penny, Polaroid of Abyssinian. I won't ask. yaoi doujinshi, license plate."  
  
"Soccer freak here blew it for us. If you hadn't given our stuff away, we would've won. Instead, we're stuck playing their damn games. AGAIN."  
  
"Shut up, Schöen."  
  
"Soccer freak."  
  
"Scar face.  
  
Schu telepathically froze them in place. "Both. Of. You. Shut. Up!"  
  
"Um, Manx?" Aya asked curiously, "What about Farfarello's group?"  
  
"We didn't find anything." Hell said with a sigh.  
  
"My string broke."  
  
"We hurt God."  
  
Violet eyes widened. "Forget I said anything."  
  
Birman smiled. "And the winners are. Brad, Aya, and Neu! Congratulations! The three of you have the option of sitting out on the next game."  
  
"What is it? Will it hurt God?"  
  
"I thought I told you to quit that!"  
  
"But it hurts."  
  
"DON'T SAY IT!"  
  
*sigh* "You said you'd try my dessert when we came back."  
  
Tot looked to Manx and Birman. "Can I eat? I'm very hungry."  
  
"Food first, then games," Ken agreed.  
  
~  
  
Hell stared apprehensively at the box on the table. A rather pungent. aroma.drifted out from inside. //Do I really want to do this? You did promise him, though.// Slowly, she picked up a plate.  
  
Farfarello was grinning like an idiot. He had refused to tell anyone what it was, nor what ingredients were in it, and now someone was going to try it. Opening the box, he removed the large covered pan.  
  
She bit her lip as Farfie cut her a piece of something that looked suspiciously like Buffalo wings. Sniffing lightly and deciding that it could've been worse. much worse. she cautiously took a bite.  
  
Ken and Tot nearly pushed her out of the way to get a piece. Both claimed they were "starving". After receiving their food, they retreated to the comfort of the sofa to eat.  
  
Aya eyed the dish with disdain. It didn't look very appetizing to him. That and he didn't want to ruin his girlish figure. Instead, he stood to one side and drank can after can of Mountain Dew. He wouldn't get fat, but he'd probably end up spending some quality time in the bathroom, with as much as he drank.  
  
Schöen and Neu finally caved to peer pressure and tried some. They took their plates and went to sit with Hell.  
  
The rest of Schwarz and Omi contented themselves with snacking on chips and pretzels.  
  
Schöen was the first to speak. "You know, this is actually pretty good, Farf. My compliments."  
  
Farfie gave her a huge grin and decided to finally tell them his secret. "Thank you. It hurts God."  
  
Everyone stopped and stared at him.  
  
"What is it?" Neu asked warily.  
  
"Well, a few days ago, we were talking about the party. I asked Crawford what we would do about togas and this guy popped out of nowhere. It hurt God to see him die, but I didn't have anywhere to put him, so I stuck him in the freezer in the basement. When Crawford said I could cook, I remembered that he was still in the freezer. Funny thing is, I thought that he'd taste different, but. he just tastes like chicken."  
  
There was a long silence, then a rush to the bathroom.  
  
Farfie looked at Ken and Tot, who were still sitting on the couch. They seemed completely unfazed by what had just transpired. Farf arched an eyebrow. "Aren't you going to run to the bathroom like everyone else?"  
  
"Huh? What? Oh. I guess they ate too much. By the way, Farf, this is really good." Ken hadn't paid much attention to Farfarello's explanation.  
  
"Why?" Tot asked innocently. "I don't have to go."  
  
He tipped his head to the side, and sat down between Tot and Ken, putting an arm around each or their shoulders. "Ya know, this could be the start of a friendship that'll really hurt God." 


End file.
